The Changing Picture of Friendship

Hi there, The Secret Blogger Here! Hope you are all well and you are enjoying the new year so far!

You know how when you make best friends, you really hope they stay your friends forever and never change. Like, if you could take a photo of that person and keep them in that mood and that way without them ever changing. I have a group of friends that I have been especially close with over the past year. I have been close with one member for the past 4 years and the others I have been acquainted with but never as close as the past year.

One member, who for anonymity purposes I am going to call 'Cake', is such a great friend, but at the moment, I just feel as if we are drifting apart; like for every tweet she posts or every single thing she says, she becomes less of that person in that metaphorical photo. One moment she will be like the old Cake that I love and then the next, she turns into the new cake, the one that she has carefully constructed to fit in with the 'cool' people. Cake has moved on in her life and I am really happy for her but there is one thing niggling away at me. My explanation is a little out there but try and stick with it.

Cake has three groups of friends, one that she is at university with, one that when she is home she goes out clubbing with and the group I am in.

I am going to describe the groups of friends as places.

Group 1: New York

Cake treats this group of friends as if they are the bees knees. She always tried her hardest to fit in and will go to any lengths to make sure she is the coolest one there. The New York group are always (and I literally mean ALWAYS) out partying. I am not saying this is a bad thing and I am not saying that I am able to decide what she does, just pointing out a fact.  The New York Group are seen as the king pins in Cake's eyes and she does everything within her power to become king of those pins, no matter who she brings down in the process.

Group 2: London

This group lives in Cake's home town and aren't as cool as The New Yorkers but are much cooler than Group 3. The 'Londoners' are the ones who Cake chooses to go out with as they look good and, I quote, they won't "[embarrass her]" - unlike Group 3. The London group can go from bar to bar and flirt with as many people and drink as much as possible with so much as a broken heel when they get home.

And finally, last (and definitely least in Cake's eyes),

Group 3: The quiet village (like Emmerdale!)

The population of this group is small, everyone knows eachother and the families are on first name terms. This is the homely village that has a small population and would rather stay in a small village compared to large rowdy city.

The group I am in (Group 3), contains Me, Missy, Cake, Lottie, Lea and Gina (whose names have been changed to sound cooler and also to keep our identities hidden!) Every week we used to have girls nights in where pizza would be ordered, girly films would be watched and gossip would be thoroughly discussed.

It is January at the time of writing this and yet there have been none of these girls nights in since SEPTEMBER! I understand that every friendship is difficult and they are all different; so I am wondering, is there any universal way to go about this problem? What kind of friendship problems do you have? And if you don't, how do you keep your friendship so great?!

And even though who I am may be a secret, don't forget to tell everyone and share this with your friends and their friends!

See you soon,

The Secret Blogger xxx